Fisticuffs

So the boy child hit someone today. I think I've mentioned a bully problem we've been having this school year, which I thought had been resolved but apparently hasn't quite. The kid who has been bugging the boy child now has a sidekick, apparently, and they like to team up and tease the boy. NICE.

So today there was a bee in the classroom, and these two boys were teasing the boy child about it, because they know he's afraid of bees. And so he told them that if they didn't quit teasing him, he was going to hit them. And so one boy said, "I wish you would!" And the boy child, who is autistic to some degree, as I might have mentioned, took the kid at his word and hauled off and hit him.

The school administrator who called to tell me about it was quite nice, explaining that she knows of the boy's history with these two kids and that she also knows about his disability, but that unfortunately hitting is Not Done at school, and so the boy had to face some consequences. From what I can figure, he had to sit in her office for a while and then he was sent back to class. So, no huge deal, I don't think.

He's not in trouble here at home, because try as I might, I can't quite figure out what he did wrong in this situation. I mean, he WARNED them, right? And they told him to hit them. And he did, because his disability prevents him from being able to recognize sarcasm. The school administrator would like me to talk with the boy about how people don't always mean what they say, and I was all, "Well, okay, but don't look for any results to come from that."

I mean, think about it. We have been trying to teach the boy social skills. We tell him that if someone says "hi" to him in the hallway, he should say "hi" back. We tell him that if someone is talking to him, he should pay attention to what they're saying and respond. But then when someone starts messing with him, teasing and name-calling and whatnot, we tell him to ignore it. Mixed signals, much? How is he supposed to know the difference? He can't, because his brain isn't wired to be able to TELL the difference. All he can do is try to memorize the rules we give him and then learn how and when to apply them, which is a HUGE struggle for him.

I suppose an autism specialist could teach him little tricks for how to do this stuff but oh, that's right, the TEA doesn't think he actually HAS a disability so we don't have access to the school district's autism specialists. No, because it's easier to punish him for his disability than to treat him for it.

I am a little pissed off, can you tell?

Anyway, the boy doesn't seem at all traumatized by the incident and no one has thrown a brick through my window with a note that says, "Your kid hit my kid! Prepare to die!" (yet) so I guess we don't have to move or change schools or anything. This week, anyway.